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To All My Valued Employees,

There have been some rumblings around the office about the future of this company, and more specifically, your job. As you know, the economy has changed for the worse and presents many challenges. However, the good news is this: The economy doesn’t pose a threat to your job. What does threaten your job however, is the changing political landscape in this country. However, let me tell you some little tidbits of fact which might help you decide what is in your best interests.

First, while it is easy to spew rhetoric that casts employers against employees, you have to understand that for every business owner there is a Back Story. This back story is often neglected and overshadowed by what you see and hear. Sure, you see me park my Mercedes outside. You’ve seen my big home at last years Christmas party. I’m sure; all these flashy icons of luxury conjure up some idealized thoughts about my life.

However, what you don’t see is the BACK STORY: I started this company 28 years ago. At that time, I lived in a 300 square foot studio apartment for 3 years. My entire living apartment was converted into an office so I could put forth 100% effort into building a company, which by the way, would eventually employ you.

My diet consisted of Ramen Pride noodles because every dollar I spent went back into this company. I drove a rusty Toyota Corolla with a defective transmission. I didn’t have time to date. Often times, I stayed home on weekends, while my friends went out drinking and partying. In fact, I was married to my business — hard work, discipline, and sacrifice.

Meanwhile, my friends got jobs. They worked 40 hours a week and made a modest $50K a year and spent every dime they earned. They drove flashy cars and lived in expensive homes and wore fancy designer clothes. Instead of hitting the Nordstrom’s for the latest hot fashion item, I was trolling through the discount store extracting any clothing item that didn’t look like it was birthed in the 70′s. My friends refinanced their mortgages and lived a life of luxury.

I, however, did not. I put my time, my money, and my life into a business with a vision that eventually, some day, I too, will be able to afford these luxuries my friends supposedly had.

So, while you physically arrive at the office at 9 A.M., mentally check in at about noon, and then leave at 5 P.M., I don’t. There is no “off” button for me. When you leave the office, you are done and you have a weekend all to yourself. I unfortunately do not have the freedom. I eat, and breathe this company every minute of the day. There is no rest. There is no weekend. There is no happy hour.

Every day this business is attached to my hip like a 1 year old special-needs child. You, of course, only see the fruits of that garden — the nice house, the Mercedes, the vacations… you never realize the Back Story and the sacrifices I’ve made.

Now, the economy is falling apart and I, the guy that made all the right decisions and saved his
money, have to bail-out all the people who didn’t. The people that overspent their paychecks suddenly
feel entitled to the same luxuries that I earned and sacrificed a decade of my life for.

Yes, business ownership has is benefits but the price I’ve paid is steep and not without wounds. Unfortunately, the cost of running this business, and employing you, is starting to eclipse the threshold of marginal benefit and let me tell you why:

I am being taxed to death and the government thinks I don’t pay enough. I have state taxes. Federal taxes. Property taxes. Sales and use taxes. Payroll taxes. Workers compensation taxes. Unemployment taxes. Taxes on taxes. I have to hire a tax man to manage all these taxes and then guess
what? I have to pay taxes for employing him.

Government mandates and regulations and all the accounting that goes with it, now occupy most of my
time. On Oct 15th, I wrote a check to the US Treasury for $288,000 for quarterly taxes. You know what my “stimulus” check was? Zero.. Nada. Zilch.

The question I have is this: Who is stimulating the economy? Me, the guy who has provided 14 people good paying jobs and serves over 2,200,000 people per year with a flourishing business? Or, the single mother sitting at home pregnant with her fourth child waiting for her next welfare check? Obviously, government feels the latter is the economic stimulus of this country.

The fact is, if I deducted (Read: Stole) 50% of your paycheck you’d quit and you wouldn’t work here. I mean, why should you? That’s nuts. Who wants to get rewarded only 50% of their hard work? Well, I agree which is why your job is in jeopardy. Here is what many of you don’t understand … to stimulate the economy you need to stimulate what runs the economy. Had suddenly government mandated to me that I didn’t need to pay taxes, guess what? Instead of depositing that $288,000 into the Washington black-hole, I would have spent it, hired more employees, and generated substantial economic growth. My employees would have enjoyed the wealth of that tax cut in the form of promotions and better salaries. But you can forget it now.

When you have a comatose man on the verge of death, you don’t defibrillate and shock his thumb thinking that will bring him back to life, do you? Or, do you defibrillate his heart? Business is at the heart of America and always has been. To restart it, you must stimulate it, not kill it. Suddenly, the power brokers in washington believe the poor of America are the essential drivers of the American economic engine. Nothing could be further from the truth and this is the type of change you can keep. So where am I going with all this? It’s quite simple.

If any new taxes are levied on me, or my company, my reaction will be swift and simple. I’ll fire you. I’ll fire your co-workers. You can then plead with the government to pay for your mortgage, your SUV, and your child’s future. Frankly, it isn’t my problem any more.

Then, I will close this company down, move to another country, and retire. You see, I’m done. I’m done with a country that penalizes the productive and gives to the unproductive. My motivation to work and to provide jobs will be destroyed, and with it, will be my citizenship.

So, if you lose your job, it won’t be at the hands of the economy; it will be at the hands of a political hurricane that swept through this country, steamrolled the constitution, and will have changed its landscape forever. If that happens, you can find me sitting on a beach, retired, and with no employees to worry about….

Signed, THE BOSS

Until this month, few Canadians knew what “subprime” meant. Fewer still could imagine why they should even care. Common in the United States, these loans are a rarity in Canada, accounting for roughly 5 per cent of all mortgages.

But these risky loans – made at inflated rates to borrowers with inadequate income and spotty credit histories – were all the rage south of the border. Last year, they accounted for 20 per cent of new mortgages, spawning a $1-trillion (U.S.) market.

We sold more books today that didn’t sell at all yesterday than we sold today of all the books that did sell yesterday.

It’s so interesting..

This past week BCE was rumoured (on the front page of the Globe) to soon be the target of a takeover by KKR — an American private equity firm. BCE quickly denied the reports, but the very next day were reported to be in talks with Telus for a possible merger. The following script (it’s a joke) from a Bell Mobility TV commercial was in todays Globe:

Bell Mobility’s latest TV commercial, take 23. Action:

Gordon: So, Frank, did you hear about the company being taken over by Lenny Kravitz?

Frank: That’s Henry Kravis, Gord. And by the time he’s finished with us, you can forget about your lifetime supply of jelly beans.

Gordon: What would an American leveraged buyout company want with us? I was checking BCE stock yesterday on my new phone using our unlimited calling plan, and apparently the share price hasn’t moved since Alexander Graham Bell last called his mom on her birthday.

Frank: That’s just it, Gord. It doesn’t matter how well you and I do at attracting the elusive 14-35 demographic in the face of intense competition from hipper, nimbler providers such as Rogers and Virgin Mobile, the fact remains that our shareholders are fed up with BCE stock stinking up their RRSPs.

Gordon: So that nice man, Michael Sabia, who interviewed us for the job, is he in trouble?

Frank: Let’s just say he might just want to think of posting his résumé on workopolis.com. You too, my furry friend. I hear they’re thinking of replacing you with a possum.

Gordon: Oh yeah? Well, don’t count your chickens, because when they find out how much Norm McDonald is getting paid to do your voice, he’ll be the out the door and you’ll be talking like Ryan Seacrest.

Frank: Seacrest’s cheap. He’s got no class.

Gordon: Maybe, but I’m scared, Frank. Very scared. I can’t afford to go back to building dams for a living. Can’t Ottawa step in?

Frank: That’s an idea! Hey, why don’t I call Stephen Harper using Bell Mobility’s amazing family and friends plan?

(Close-up on Frank holding the ultracool LG Fusic phone. He dials.)

Frank: Prime Minister’s office, please. Oh, hi Mr. Harper. Say, I wondered if you could do something to stop Americans taking over Canada’s most prized telecommunications network and infrastructure? Hmm-hmm. Yep. Uh-ha. OK. (Hangs up.)

Gord: What’s he say?

Frank: He said he’d like to help us, but there’s no Quebec or 905 votes in it.

Gord: That’s it. I’m outta here. Screw those monkeys, I’m heading over to Telus.

Frank: Me too.

Exeunt, pursued by a bear.

Link to article

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through Bay Street
The brokers and traders had put up their feet
They hung up no stockings, ’cause their only real goal
Is to make sure that Flaherty gets a large chunk of coal

In Cowtown, the oilmen met near Bankers Hall
(Beats fighting the crowd at Chinook Centre mall)
They set up a bonfire, instead of a tree
So they could burn the poor minister in effigy

Then outside the door there arose such a clatter,
I woke from my slumber to see what was the matter
So loud was the noise, I could only assume
That Xstrata’s Big Mick had burst into the room

For a moment I thought, as I peered through the glass
That I spotted Ted Rogers, with a bag full of cash
Though we worry how much he will spend on the Jays
He’s got a good plan: “Cable fees will be raised!”

But the man with the sack wasn’t Ted, Jim or Mick
I knew, soon enough, that it must be St. Nick.
He climbed in the sleigh, one more check of his list
(Anyone bet Flaherty’s house will be missed?)

“Now Dasher! Now Dancer! Now Prancer and Vixen!
Head eastward, then north, to the home of Gord Nixon!”
Though why he needs toys is not plain to see
Doesn’t Royal Bank’s stock price defy gravity?

Some gifts are simple, and obvious too
Like Inco’s new owners — that Brazilian crew
They will get parkas, ’cause they weren’t ever told
That winter in Sudbury could be so damn cold!

Or consider John Sleeman — he’s easy to please:
“I need books and tapes, Santa, to learn Japanese”
And Heather and Gerry, they cannot complain
She’ll receive lots of books, and he’ll get some airplanes

For others, it’s harder — how can Santa delight
A child whose year has already been bright?
Take Gluskin and Sheff, the two boys with the grins
Who are lolling in money from their IPO wins

Or Jim, from RIM, which has had a great run
(Though the stock options probe just might spoil the fun)
He’s lucky and rich, but he’s got one more scheme
“Santa,” he said, “I still want my own team.”

Some gifts are so big, even St. Nick has no say
A new job for Pannell? Respect for PK?
Mike Z has a wish — get Nortel out of trouble
“Sorry,” said Santa, “I can’t bring back the bubble”

The elves are confused (they’re a little bit dumb)
About why Eric Sprott asked for uranium
When Michael MacMillan sent his own wishful pitch
“Forget it, big fella — you’re already too rich.”

Munk’s an old geezer, but not without wants
NovaGold, say, or even Newmont?
The TSX boss craves the biggest of all
“Please,” he begged Santa, “can’t I have Montreal?”

Santa gave a big sigh, then leapt to his feet
“They sure are demanding, this bunch from Bay Street
“But as for ol’ Flaherty, he can go and pound sand
“Thanks to his trust tax, I just lost fifty grand!”

So, now heads must roll at Yahoo!. If so, I’d like to nominate the first one: Brad Garlinghouse.

Things have been busy this last couple weeks, but nothing really that I can disclose. That coupled with things coming up prevented me from writing a wrap-up the last couple weeks.

I came across across an article on MarketWatch about the Peanut Butter Manifesto – an internal (now external) memo written by Yahoo! exec Brad Garlinghouse. After reading other reports, I learned that this has been circulating inside Yahoo for the last couple weeks now. Garlinghouse is a gutsy guy a confused fellow and actually (had) shaved a Y into the back of his head. Initially I thought this was purposely leaked as a precursor to big changes coming – after reading the memo, I think it may have been purposely leaked but for other reasons..

I’ve heard our strategy described as spreading peanut butter across the myriad opportunities that continue to evolve in the online world. The result: a thin layer of investment spread across everything we do and thus we focus on nothing in particular. I hate peanut butter. We all should.

The entire letter can be read from the WSJ.